Irrational Cognitive Beliefs – What to do about our unhelpful bogus beliefs
Alright, let's talk about those annoying irrational beliefs that love to set up shop in our brains and throw a full-blown negativity party. We've all been there, right? That little voice whispering (or sometimes shouting) things that just aren't true but feel oh-so-real. So, how do we get rid of those uninvited?
My Brain's Gone Rogue: Taming Those Irrational Beliefs
Look, our brains are weird. They're like that over-enthusiastic friend who means well but sometimes says the most outlandish things. "Everyone hates me," "I'm a total failure," "If I don't do this perfectly, the world will end." Sound familiar? They're distorted, exaggerated, and frankly, just plain unhelpful.
We don't have to believe them, we can challenge them, question them, and ultimately, evict them from our mental space. It takes work, time and practice to eventually keep them in check.
Step 1: Spotting the Culprits
First things first, we need to identify these sneaky beliefs. It's like catching a thief – you need to know what you're looking for. Common culprits include:
All-or-nothing thinking: "If I'm not perfect, I'm a failure."
Overgeneralising: "I messed up this presentation, so I'm terrible at everything."
Mental filtering: Focusing only on the negative and ignoring the positive.
Jumping to conclusions: "They didn't reply to my message, they must hate me."
Catastrophising: "If I don't get this job, my life is over."
Personalisation: "They're talking about me, I just know it."
Imposter Syndrome- “I’m going to get found out any minute”, “I’m just pretending”, “everyone else knows what they are doing”
Step 2: Questioning the Narrative
Once you've spotted an irrational belief, it's time to put it on trial. Ask yourself:
Is there any real evidence for this? (Or am I just making assumptions?)
What's the worst that could actually happen? (And could I handle it?)
What would I tell a friend who had this belief? (We're often kinder to others than ourselves.)
Are there any alternative explanations? (Probably a whole load.)
Is this belief helping me or hurting me? (Spoiler: if it's irrational, it's hurting you)
Step 3: Reframing the Thought
Now, let's replace that irrational belief with something more realistic and helpful. Instead of "I'm a failure," try "I made a mistake, but I can learn from it." Instead of "Everyone hates me," try "Some people might not like me, and that's okay."
It's about shifting your perspective, finding the grey areas, and giving yourself a break.
Step 4: Practice, Practice, Practice
This isn't a one-and-done deal. Our brains are creatures of habit, so we need to consistently challenge those irrational beliefs. Every time you catch yourself thinking negatively, stop, question it, and reframe it.
Reflect on your new behaviours and thought processes, write down the benefit and ‘bank’ this. Each time your brain starts to play tricks, take a withdrawal from your ‘emotional bank’, remember how good it felt to challenge your bogus belief, to think and feel a different way. Notice the benefit!
Busting your Bogus Beliefs will always take time and energy, know this and always be prepared for this with your tools and techniques that will actually be helpful, unlike your irrational cognitive thinking which is never your friend.